The future character of the child is very much dependent on the mother’s character and influences as it is she who spends most of the time with the child; knowing the child’s personalities and character. Therefore, it has little value to the wisdom and excellence of the father,as if he is the one who is working as the time spent with the child will have little relevance and value if opposed by the mother. A child requires correction and discipline to train him or her to become a man or woman of good character - therefore a mother, who is the main carer, needs to devote time and energy to correct, rebuke and train up the child in the way he or she should go so when they are older they do not depart from good and follow God’s way in readiness to be spiritually strong to face the world in education and employment.
In clear terms I will expand for the benefit of my dear friend, who is concerned about the text and precisely what I mean; I have edited the above text and hope that it is clear.
What do I mean by this?
Well, in the ‘old way of Christian parenting’ it is the mother who stays at home to care for and bring up the children; using God-given skills, abilities and order to enable the children to progress physically, spiritually, emotionally and intellectually.
My point is this, that as the mother’s influence is greater due to the time spent during that child’s waking hours then it is of primary importance, to know your child to correct and discipline accordingly; to enable him or her to grow up in the fear and knowledge of the Lord, before they go to school and work where they may meet opposition to God’s way.
I have four children and as such have to ‘discipline them differently as what will work for one will not work for the others; one may require firm discipline and a fair punishment to stop a repeat occurence; whilst another just a simple vocal reprimand or ‘look”. Then, being boys and girls makes a difference to correction. However, the greatest affect is to understand and know the child to build up a bond with the child – therefore as the father may be at work in the beginning years of a child’s life it is the mother who in the main needs to give the child a loving godly influence to enalbe the child to know right from wrong and who their heavenly Father is.
Children also recall events from their past and to have a negative influence which in turn impacts their future and decisions made; as I know from friends who have turned from God because of overly strict parents who came across as unloving and not like Christ at all – putting them off following Jesus, sadly.
I trust this clarifies that it is written from a Christian perspective about rearing children and the fact dad’s generally go out to work leaving mother’s to bring up the child: 50/52 weeks per year; 5/7 days; 16/24 hours a day or more depending on the husband’s working hours.
May I recommend reading these books:
Child training by Turnbull
Details are on my Good reads selection on blog page is an excellant book and if you are near you may borrow it; if you are far I bought mine from The Metropolitan Tabernacle almost 16 years or so ago after our firstborn’s arrival. I will seek to peruse my library to add more relevant books.
“The Mother” is especially helpful on principles of child raising–must reading for all parents! There are so many valuable encouragements and child-training has not changed over the years for Christians:
Thank you, mother’s have an important influence on our live’s – stay blessed not stressed!
Recommending reading the article as I am recommending the book regarding a mothers influence; by no way means single parent upbringing on the contrary whoever is in sole care has most responsibility while the father is out to work it is the mother who trains up the child. Therefore if a mother does not do a ‘good job’ it can affect the child so yes both parents are to be involved but one will have sole care or Christian relative or childminder!
Sorry I have tried to delete comment due to spelling mistakes but couldn’t!
Dangerous ground Sharon. Is this a scientific study or just someone’s opinion from Timothy Shay Arthur? This article gives the impression that a single parent i.e a mother is sufficient to bring up a child adequately. I think there needs to be a balance between mother and fathers roles especially with the strong LGBT community claims that a same sex couple can adequately raise children.
I believe that it is God’s will to have heterosexual parents and that all resistance should be made to prevent same sex parenting or single sex parenting.
I await your reply!
I wrote it with reference from the book and title but did not mean it to sound how you read it. I endorse marriage between one man and one woman – believing God then blesses the marriage in the unity of the man and woman with children.
I have now updated the article to hopefully explain what I meant, for all to read and understand clearly – sorry if it was as clear as mud before!
Please let me know if it has improved!